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I need to get it through my bimbo head that's all I'm goodfor. Ryan isn't going to marry me. He basically said so last night andbesides, how dumb do I have to be to think this guy would marry a girlwho gives it up all around town? I've had hundreds of cocks inside ofme and gallons of cum in me and on me. I'm destined to have hundredsmore and gallons more. It's what I wanted. Now I have it. So why soserious?I'm a slut and that's all I'll ever be, so I better start acting thepart every day and just plunging down that road because if I'm dumbenough to think some guy is going to want me as a wife I'm out of myfucking mind. Nobody is going to want me like that. So fine. Fuckthem. Rise up and be what they want. Rise up and be what you've alwayswanted. Fucking party, girl. Now. Fuck them all.End Diary EntryDiary Entry: March 2009I am a coke whore. I fucking love the stuff and I'll do anything anyonewants when they have it and I want it. Why? Why the fuck am I so intoit?. Was it mom who seduced him or was it grandpa who forced his will on her which eventually made her his second mistress. Were dad and grandma still oblivious to these adulterous sins behind their backs? Finally made a crazy rationalization that maybe it was ok for mom to get screwed by her father in law as dad was away so often and grandpa was a member of the family.One more thing about my family was that my grandma was a north Indian and she never understood telugu, so most often we would either be speaking English or Hindi. One queer thing I noticed about a month back before that mid day screwing session I described in my earlier post , was that mom and grandpa started conversing in Telugu especially in the company of either me or grandpa.They would speak hindi and suddenly grandpa would switch to telugu which would invariably make my mom blush. Grandma never really understood what exactly they were speaking in telugu and surprisingly she never really bothered to know why either. I.
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